When it comes to working on a task that is beyond my control, especially the ones I feel attached to as I always put my heart and soul to work, it is never easy to think of it no matter how hard I try not to. This task that I have been dealing with lately is absolutely no exception. Given all the effort I have put in financially and mentally, I cannot help expecting and worrying about the outcomes.
Today, I have come to the solution to unlock my own negative thoughts and to look at it from a whole new fresh perspective. After a few casual discussions with P’Gluay, a careful consideration of all possibilities and with a few thought-out backup plans in mind, I finally was able to let go of that worry. I figured that, first, because there is no benefits of worrying about something that I have no control over or to put it more simply, I can do nothing about it. Also, the only person can help me is me, well, in this case. So, I need to help me escape this mental trap and I was able to find the light at the end of the tunnel today.
I have to ensure that I am doing this (my PhD) for the benefit of myself and my workplace.
I do not know and cannot be certain what future holds for me and how many rocky, bumpy roads are ahead of this PhD path. The only thing I can be sure is that I can always do my best.
I also think of this as one of many struggles O have and will continue to encounter during this PhD project.
The more I encounter, hopefully, the more I can deal with more maturely, reasonably and intellectually.
1/21/2019 1.13 am.
Edited 1/21/2019 10.35 pm.
